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Scorpions? Alaska? …what?

You heard me right. There are no. Scorpions. In. Alaska.  But there are many scorpions in Oklahoma.

Have you ever been to Alaska?  I have…twice.  The beauty of it takes my breath away.  I’ve seen glaciers, bears, moose, baby moose (a calf), whales, and that’s just to name a few.  I’ve yet to see the Northern Lights (Aurora Borealis) but I pray someday I will be that lucky.  The Alaskan cold, I can tolerate. The Oklahoma scorpions, I cannot.   Someday soon, the hubs and I will make Alaska our forever home.  I do not know when, but I am greatly looking forward to that day.

A little background on moi…. I moved to Oklahoma with my mama and 3 older siblings when I was 6 months old. I grew up in Tulsa and I remember visiting Grandma and Grandpa “in the country” (aka Osage County). They had scorpions outside under rocks and wood, on the picnic table in their back yard and elsewhere outside. There were also the occasional scorpions inside the house. I always thought that odd… Who wants scorpions in their house, anyway? Why live like that?

Fast forward to 2006 when I married the hubby. After we said “I do”, I moved in to his country abode and started our happily ever after.   I now have these blessed little critters gracing me with their presence on every possible occasions.  But this is the price I pay for country living.  I love living in the country… The peace and quiet, the long drives away from civilization, the ability to have acreage and do whatever I dang well please with it.  To answer my own questions, I live with the scorpions so that I may have a peaceful house in the country.

If only I’d taken pictures of the places I’ve seen the little beasts over the past 8 years. You’d be amazed!

Some of the places I have found scorpions:  in my Kitchen Aid mixing bowl in the kitchen. (Scorpion chip cookies, anyone?) In my shoe. In the kids diaper bag. In the kids toybox.  Crawling up the walls. In boxes. In clothes baskets. In the bathtub. In the sink. Need I go on?

My 3 favorite places for finding scorpions over the last 8 years:

My third favorite place to find one was….. Wait for it….. In my bed. That’s right! Just inches away from my little eyes as I groggily awoke from a dream. “Am I dreaming? Is this real? Surely there’s not a scorpion just a few inches from my face”…. Hit myself, hit myself… Nope not a dream! Imagine the shock and awe that ensued after that.  I needed therapy after that and lived in fear for months until the hot summer days died off and gave me some relief. (Kidding! Sort of…) Fun times, I tell ya.

My second favorite place was in my shirt. Yep! Plopped that bad boy over my shoulders and realized I had something squirming on my chest.  Looked down…guess who! Then came the crazy dance to get the creature off of me and by some miracle of all miracles, I didn’t get stung.  I did get pinched. But I’m not complaining.

My all time favorite place was (and always is) on the floor. One happy summer day a couple of years ago, I was dancing and singing happily (not a pretty site, don’t judge me) with my infant Declan in my arms.  I kicked something on the floor and felt a little zing in my foot. You know how you know you’ve stepped on something, so you dreadfully look down at your foot, thinking the worst but hoping for the best? Well… It was the worst. What a surprise when I saw a scorpion on my foot! I flung it off with all of the powers inside of me and realized I’d been stung. I screamed. I cried. I handed the baby off to my husband as I hopped around on one foot, wailing like a dying seal.  The 2 hours of throbbing pain!  The searing anger!  I will never forget.

So I will reiterate my point. There are no scorpions in Alaska.  But there are many, many scorpions in Oklahoma.

 

2 Comments

  1. Yikes! Scorpions are no fun! I remember finding them as a kid in the mid-west, and I ran as far as away as I could. Of course, the boys got closer to it. No thanks!

    • Lol! Thanks For the comment Rikki! I find that one of my boys is fascinated with them (tries to pick then up, much to my horror)and the other screams when he sees them. I’d rather they be out or my life completely. No thanks for me also!!

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